Be able to negotiate. The psychologist explained which relationships will strengthen a marriage

Who in the family should cook the soup and clean the house so that the union of a man and a woman is strong? What roles should husband and wife take on to save the marriage?

Shared his opinion with aif.ru Doctor of Psychology, Professor, Family Psychologist Ilya Slobodchikov.

The history of house building goes back to the distant past. In a modern family, roles are distributed according to the principle of mutual agreement. It is important to have the most understanding attitude towards your spouse. If people know how to negotiate and hear each other, then they will not run away at the first quarrel.

Of course, upbringing must be taken into account. If a boy was raised in the situation that he is a star, and the whole world revolves around him, or a girl was taught from an early age that her husband must certainly be a breadwinner and provide (and you are our Marfushka-darling, remembering “Morozko”), then such a marriage won’t last long. Most likely, it will end in a very nasty divorce.

If one of the spouses does not work, then this does not give the second the right to constantly reproach the non-working spouse, remove himself from the life of the family and, after work, be a “log on the sofa.” Firstly, there are different reasons for leaving a job. Secondly, raising a child is also hard work. An attitude in the spirit of “I support the whole house, don’t come to me, dad is resting” will not lead to anything good.

It is also important to take into account employment and the quality of work of both spouses. Of course, working as an accountant and as a surgeon requires different levels of involvement and responsibility. But you need to understand that during the period of annual reports, accountants sit with their heads in their numbers for days. Marriage is a joint effort, when during times of tension one another calmly takes on household responsibilities, not shying away from cooking soup, washing the floor, and going for bread, without making any disaster out of it.

With such a calm attitude towards household responsibilities, towards the understanding that the other half is also a person and also has the right to be tired and busy, to not have time to do something, everything will be much simpler.